Vogue Williams’ fears following split from husband Brian McFadden: ‘I’ve ruined my life’

She’s now happily married to Spencer Matthews

Vogue Williams has opened up about her split from her first husband – and her fears afterwards that she would “never have kids”.

The star – who is mum to Theodore, six, Gigi, four, and Otto, two, with husband Spencer Matthews – was previously married to Westlife singer Brian McFadden.

And Vogue has now spoken about her fears following their split, as she opened up about being a divorcee at the age of 31…

Vogue Williams worried she was making a mistake on the day she married husband Brian McFadden (Credit: Splash News)

Vogue Williams on split from first husband

Model and presenter Vogue Williams married Brian McFadden in September 2012. They split three years later and their divorce was finalised in 2017.

Speaking on The Life of Bryony podcast, Vogue – who turns 40 in October – reflected on her love life ahead of her milestone birthday.

“I am excited at turning 40,” she said. “When you are 19 or 20, you think that 40 year olds are really old and battered. Then you actually get there and you think, this is a really nice moment.

“In your thirties, you are still trying to figure stuff out. I remember being divorced at 31 and thinking, I’ve ruined my life. I am never going to have kids, I am never going to do what I always wanted to do.

“Then you see how your life actually starts to unfold – that’s why it feels exciting to move into your forties.”

Wedding blues

From the off Vogue said that she had concerns she was making a mistake by marrying Brian.

In excerpts from her upcoming autobiography, Big Mouth, serialised in Life Magazine, Vogue reveals worrying details of her wedding day.

She writes: “The morning of the wedding I felt very stressed and so anxious because deep down I knew I had made a mistake. After the wedding I tried to make things work. The relationship wasn’t all terrible, we did have some great times too, and for the most part he was good fun to be around. But he was not husband material.

“It was me who called it in the end. I couldn’t keep trying, it felt pointless. I’m not here to throw anyone under the bus but there are things that went on in our relationship that will never be forgiven.”

Vogue said she couldn’t help but be drawn to second husband Spencer Matthews (Credit: Splash News)

Rift rumours with second husband Spencer Matthews

“After my divorce, I wanted to go and be worldly: live a life going on loads of dates – it just didn’t happen,” she said on the podcast this week.

Vogue, of course, went on to marry Made in Chelsea star Spencer Matthews in 2018.

“When I met Spencer, I knew I shouldn’t go for him. I based that on what others had said about him. But, when you meet him, you’re just drawn to him. You want to be in his company. He’s funny, he’s self-deprecating. Quite Irish in that sense,” she said.

Vogue also opened up about the constant rumours about their relationship being on the rocks.

“We live in a world now where it’s possible for literally any random person to get a thought in their head and spread it around.  What do you do? You have to just constantly bat off rumours and crap that you know isn’t true.

“Me and Spencer choose the route of just letting it go over our heads. There’s always going to be people who spread gossip, you have to leave them to it.

“I have a great family, I am happy at the moment. I don’t need to be worried about what anyone else is saying,” she added.