‘They don’t respond to authority or hierarchy’

The wife of Harry Judd, Izzy, has revealed that one of their children has been diagnosed with a condition and said it has been “one of the most challenging experiences”.

Izzy and McFly star Harry are proud parents to three children: Lola, eight and sons Kit, seven and Lockie, three.

Recently though, Izzy shared that one of their children was diagnosed neurodivergent, and opened up about how she has adapted her parenting to cater to the condition.

They are parents to three children (Credit: SplashNews.com)

Harry Judd’s wife reveals child’s diagnosis

This week, Izzy appeared on Dr Alex George’s Stompcast podcast, where she revealed that one of their kids suffers from Pathological Demand Avoidance, and said it has been “one of the most challenging experiences”.

PDA syndrome is a specific profile within the autism spectrum. Those that suffer with it typically demonstrate an extreme avoidance of demands. And even simple requests could trigger anxiety.

“Pathological demand avoidance is linked with autism and it’s basically about demands that are put on a child who underneath the demand has a lot of anxiety,” Izzy shared.

She added: “From the moment a child wakes up in the morning, they are being told to eat their breakfast, get dressed, brush your teeth. And all these anxieties are forming in them – that people are putting pressure and demands on them.”

Izzy candidly opened up (Credit: Giovanna Fletcher / YouTube)

‘A demand is too anxiety-provoking’

Izzy then said she has changed her parenting approach completely and admitted other people have have seen her methods as “lazy”.

She said: “They don’t respond to authority or hierarchy. They want autonomy, they want to be in control. If you flip it and go: ‘I’ve left your clothes out…’ I actually just don’t even say it any more.

“And I don’t ask many questions at all because that’s placing a demand, and a demand is too anxiety-provoking.”

She continued: “To the outsider looking in, they might see that as a sort of lazy parenting. Or a lack of discipline or whatever it is they want to say.”

“I kind of let go of being late a long time ago. The more pressure you feel – ‘You’ve got to go!’ – the more it’s going to slow everything down. Now I just shove them in the car, and if they’re cold, they’ll put on their coat. Once they feel the autonomy that they’re in control, amazing things happen.”

Izzy ‘felt judgement really heavily’

Izzy then noted: “There are quite rigid societal expectations of how children are supposed to behave. Initially, I felt the judgement really heavily. You have to go through a kind of grief process that things aren’t going to be as you thought they would be.

“For a neurodivergent child, they’re physically unable to sit. It’s not because they don’t want to – they can’t. But then, as a parent, you’re going: ‘I need to teach my child to sit at the table and say please and thank you.’ What if they can’t look at somebody? What if that makes them feel really uncomfortable?”

Read more: Harry Judd’s three-year-old son rushed to hospital after washing pod ‘burst and got into his eyes’